Whoops Apocalypse

I seem to have very vivid dreams on a very regular basis. This is a fairly recent phenomena as I suffered from insomnia for years.

One of my recent favourites was getting on rocket heading to the moon and ‘experiencing’ G-force.

Last night, however, I dreamt of  a nuclear holocaust.

My dream was set in a small unnamed and unnamable quiet rural town (I actually live in London). Word got around that there was a nutter threatening to blow the world up with an atomic bomb with immediate effect. Orders were to hide in the basement of local churches and stay there until further notice as this was the safest place to be. On no account must we leave the churches once sealed in as we ran the very real risk of burning to death on contact with the outside world.

So I went to my dream flat and got some things together then headed for my designated church. On entering the basement I found, to my horror, that everyone was dressed in tuxedos and ballgowns and the basement was actually a posh bar. I saw my friends there – there were the Beta Males Picnic with their families. We said hello. They told me my Dad was over there. I replied that that couldn’t be right as they didn’t live here. I turned around and there was my father standing before me. Except it wasn’t actually my real life Dad, it was a very tall bloke with huge blue eyes that didn’t look, act or sound anything like my Dad. We chatted for a while and then he and another man said we were leaving. I panicked. They dragged me out of the basement. The room fell silent, but no one did anything to stop what was happening. I was terrified. Didn’t they know that we might die instantly?

We walked briskly out into the daylight and down the road. They walked either side of me, firmly holding my arms lest I try to make a run for it. As we turned a corner we were face with a huge SWAT team who started firing at us. This was completely terrifying and went on for about 10 dream minutes, round 3 corners. Miraculously, not one of us was hit. I realised then that my ‘Dad’ was the nutter.

Then, like all dreams, we were somewhere else. It seemed to be the inside of an abandoned school building. Another woman appeared. She was taken into a corridor by one of the men, I can’t remember which, and it sounded as though she suffered either a beating or something much worse. I didn’t see her again.

At this point, my ‘Dad’ was know completely evil. He kept talking about blowing the world and everything in it to pieces and that nothing was going to stop him.

Then, I had somehow escaped, walking back to the church. I told everyone that they had time to go back to their homes to get whatever they might need, but not long.

I went to my flat and sat on my bed, going through some clothes. Adam from the Beta Males appeared at my window and asked if he could come in. He could. I told him what had happened and that I thought someone had been raped. We went to get food.

We ended up in a huge, obviously abandoned, shopping mall, but the sandwich bar was still open and fully operational. We got something, can’t remember what, then went back to my flat.

Then the bomb went off.

Remember ‘Threads’? The white flash of nuclear apocalypse? That happened. Repeatedly. But we were all still alive. We went back to the church to sit it out.

Happy Father’s Day.


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